Paedocrats - The Scourge of Local Government

'If you tremble with indignation at every injustice, then you are a comrade of mine.' Che Guevara

I seem to have done an awful lot of trembling lately. In fact I think I have had an internal tremour for the last few years and it shows no sign of calming. Despite my meditating and trying to make sense of things.

In a previous blog I mentioned whistle blowing. Last week I witnessed a whistle blower being ignored. Swept under the carpet. And I ask myself...what's the point?

Backs rubbed - literally - secret meetings, jobs for the boys (and girls). Inept, pompous prats, filled with their own self importance, having 'talks', meeting after meeting, discussing ways of making the bad look good, feathering their nests, padding out their CVs, desperately putting positive spins on anything that, with a bit of digging, would reveal their incompetence and always, always striving to silence the voices of descent.

I ask myself 'Why is it that those who are the least self actualised succeed?'

I know part of the answer lies in the ruthlessness of these bureaucrats - and the fact that they are just that - bureaucrats. The lack of creativity, loyalty, vision, empathy and humility. The total selfishness. The desire to win at any cost. The desire to be important. These people hold power because they have 'networked', they have spent years making contact with those who
can further their careers, fellow conspirators without conscience. They have schemed and plotted and lied. It is almost like paedophiles, who always manage to recognise each other, who always manage to make contact with other like minded pervs no matter how discreet or how far away they may be. Like paedophiles they have no sympathy for their victims, they think they will never be caught out and they think they have a right to do exactly as they please. They are Paedocrats! In my lowly position I have seen that they continually fail to meet deadlines, they break promises, lie and distort facts and data and they manipulate the truth to meet their own ends. I have heard them repeat a lie, like a mantra, until that lie becomes a false truth and the ignorant, gullible people around them begin to believe the false truth and some even begin to think in the same ugly way.


'The revolution is not an apple that falls when it is ripe. You have to make it fall' Che Guevara

Kill Bill

I was five and he was six
We rode on horses made of sticks
He wore black and I wore white
He would always win the fight

Bang bang, he shot me down
Bang bang, I hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, my baby shot me down.

Seasons came and changed the time
When I grew up, I called him mine
He would always laugh and say
"Remember when we used to play?"

Bang bang, I shot you down
Bang bang, you hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, I used to shoot you down.

Music played, and people sang
Just for me, the church bells rang.

Now he's gone, I don't know why
And till this day, sometimes I cry
He didn't even say goodbye
He didn't take the time to lie.

Bang bang, he shot me down
Bang bang, I hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, my baby shot me down...

I absolutely loved 'Kill Bill' (both volumes) so much so that I have watched it twice in the past week. 'Kill Bill' is one story shown over the course of two films as the running length of 4 hours was too long for one film. They were released one year apart almost 10 years ago. I don't know why I didn't see them when they were released and can only think that they came out at a time of my life when I wasn't a great film goer or watcher. Tarantino, the writer and director, has always been a favourite of mine and in these films he excels himself and, as ever, pays homage to various film genres. KB is influenced by several genres including Spaghetti Westerns and Chanbara films, and as usual with Tarantino the films have fantastic soundtracks. This is where Amazon comes into its own. Last weekend while watching 'Kill Bill Volume 1' I was able to log on to Amazon, buy the CD of the soundtrack and have it arrive within a couple of days. 'The Grand Duel' by Luis Bacalov is a particularly haunting piece of music which, although a Spaghetti Western style of music, accompanies the animated part of the film in which O-Ren witnesses the murder of her parents by the Japanese Mafia, Yakuza. O-Ren, played perfectly by the beautiful Lucy Lu, is a master of the art of the sword fighting. 'You might not be able to fight like a samurai, but you can at least die like a samurai' O-Ren tells the equally beautiful Uma Thurman who somehow manages to play the apart of a ruthless assassin with charm and grace.

more lies.....

The Invention of Lying - which I watched last night, features an alternative world where is no such thing as lying. Or empathy , or plain good manners it would seem. Everyone tells the truth and only the truth. A simple 'How are you?' will typically get the response 'suicidal' or maybe even 'constipated' and the inhabitants of this strange world fall over themselves to let you have their truth - with both barrels. Placing an order in a restaurant for instance will result in the waiter telling you exactly what he thinks of you and Chef's recommendations take on a whole new meaning. This a world where everyone is blunt and painfully honest. Not to say cruel. Mark (Ricky Gervais) discovers the concept of lying. With the ability to lie, he makes changes to his life and the life's of those around him. Ultimately he accidentally invents religion. Naturally there is a love story thrown in for good measure but I found the film utterly depressing. And confusing. Life in this alternative reality lacked substance and worth, not because there was no such thing as truth or lies (and no word for truth or lie either, the concept of an untruth so alien, Mark says with a perplexed expression it is 'saying something that isn't) but because there is no empathy or compassion. It was a Stepford Wives for the masses. At the end I felt quite relived I live in a world filled with lies!

But there are degrees of lies. Lying by omission, lying to protect yourself or others, lying to cause pain, lying to make yourself appear more confident, important and interesting. In a previous blog I looked at lying in a light hearted way. The small lies we tell every day, the 'I'm on my way' or 'No, your bum does not look big in that' type of lies that are almost socially acceptable and sometimes expected. You are meant to say that your friends new born baby is absolutely adorable when you actually think the small, wrinkled and squashed human being looks anything but attractive or cute. You would lose friends at an alarming rate if you always spoke the truth to them.

Today's 'The Big Questions', a programme that debates moral, ethical and religious views explored, among other things, the Devil. Most religions have a devil like figure. Even Buddhism has Mara, a devil like figure. Mara tries to prevent humans from practicing a spiritual life by 'making the mundane alluring or the negative positive'. Mara is also attributed with the power of 'preventing the person from seeing the truth.' However, unlike the Christian devil for instance, Mara is not a being in it's own right but more the negative side of ones own being. The devil I am more familiar with, the one of my childhood, is the fallen angel who had a row with God over something and was 'banished'. Put out by this banishment the fallen angel changed his name to Satan (AKA as Lucifer and a few other aliases) and setup home in a place called Hell which is filled with brimstone and fire and when I was a child I was often told I would be going there one day if I didn't say my prayers, confess my sins or do my homework. Satan swapped his wings for horns, and for some unexplained reason, his feet for hoofs and he enjoys the ability to transfigurate into various shapes and forms. According to some twat on 'TBQs' Satan also enjoys possessing pubs, factories and the occasional African. Now, let's suspend all rational thought and good sense for a moment and accept that Satan exists and is happily living in Hell and gets his kicks from tempting us mortals to lie, fornicate and generally do bad things. As the world is full of liars, fornicators and adulterers Satan must be very pleased with himself. On the 'domestic' front he has us all saying 'why, thank you, just what I've always wanted' as we unwrap yet another pair of socks or jar of bath salts and he has, it seems, almost everyone who has a pulse fornicating whenever they get the opportunity. And 60% of married men committing adultery according to the latest figures. On a bigger scale he has Catholic priests abusing children and the Catholic church covering up the extent of the the abuse. He has wars being fought in the name of God, he has child turning on child, brother on brother. Why then would he waste his time possessing some poor African woman or scaring customers trying to enjoy a pint in some rural pub? Why does he show his presence by getting his victims to 'speak in tongues' or vomit glass shards? Mere parlour tricks for a being that could, if you believe the devil believers, cause global destruction seem such a waste of time. I loved the comment by a the Humanist in the audience who made them look like the (dangerous) fools they are when she asked 'why not put these exorcisms on YouTube? You would have thousands of converts.'

'I don't really believe in the Devil, but if the Devil is the Father of Lies, then he certainly invented the Internet. Ken Macleod'

Mum and Dad

I was expecting him to look much older. A face to match the voice. But no, he looked very well preserved. I would have guessed, had I not known his real age, that he was in his late 50s. Hearing that cheered him up immensely. But his face was relatively free of wrinkles and lines, his skin had a good healthy colour and his eyes were as blue as they always were. Only the white hair on his head and face showed any signs of age having lost long ago the colour of his youth. When I arrived he was sitting down and as I was wearing my highest heels when he stood up he seemed much smaller than I remembered. He said he was 5'9'' as a young man but now he was much closer to 5' 7'' and, as my heels increased my height to around 5'11'' I towered above him. After a hug he sat back down and when I asked him how he was in a very small voice he said 'not so good' and told me all about his aches and pains, of which, sadly, there are many. The first couple of hours were slightly stilted, formal and polite but later in the afternoon the atmosphere lightened and we were able to laugh and relax and when it was time for him to leave I could swear he had grown in stature and his voice had returned to that stronger, confident tone I recognised.
I can't remember the last time I was alone with my mum and dad. I certainly don't think I have been since I was a 'grown up'. There has always been someone else there, siblings, children, husbands, step mothers and fathers. In fact the last time the three of us were together must have been before my sister was born over 40 years ago. They have a strange relationship, my mum and dad. They have been friends far longer than they were a married couple. Their relationship is based on friendship, shared memories, tolerance and a sense of humour. I was thinking just the other day that the only reason I can stay in touch with my rather mad mum is the fact that she has a great sense of humour. It was interesting to watch the banter between them, the almost flirtatious way they will tell a story. It was great to talk about great grandparents, grandparents, old maiden aunts and the places where we had lived. I found out things that endeared my wonderful paternal grandparents to me even more. My mum had never told me that the Christmas my sister was born (December 23rd) my grandparents has held a late Christmas for my mum when she came out of hospital 10 days later. She returned home to a decorated flat, complete with tree, presents and a turkey. The only extraordinary Christmas I remember is the one when we were forced to have sausages for dinner as my dad was celebrating Christmas with his 'fancy woman'. Actually this isn't a Christmas I remember but one I have heard about from my mum so many times it is almost as if I recall the horror of not having a turkey and having to settle for a pork sausage instead. My dad denied any knowledge of this, and in fact of ever having a 'fancy woman'. I learnt that my dad had a breakdown after the death of his father, that he stayed with the army for a year after completing his national service, that he thought he was ugly as a young man, compared to his very handsome younger brother, that he asked for his finger to be amputated and that he still loved my mum. I learnt that my mum would spend all the housekeeping on high fashion, married my dad for his mothers cooking, left the hospital in her dressing gown and walked home, while in labour with me, because 'after 24 hours and no sign of a baby what would you do?' They both whispered other little secrets to me the minute the other one left the room to pop to the loo or make a cup of tea and I learnt that maybe they would have had a happier, calmer, more fulfilling life if they has stayed married to each other. But then - maybe not.

de ja vue part 2

It is soul destroying to witness something unfair, unjust and, oh, I don't know....just wrong happening, and being powerless to stop it. Not having the words to offer comfort or to attempt reason or explanation is painful and sickening. A couple of years ago I helplessly stood by and watched someone, who had spent the largest part of their working life making a difference to children's life's, being treated with contempt and disdain by people not worthy enough to lick their boots. And once again, less than three years after that travesty, I am having to witness the same process all over again. This time two decent caring people - knowledgeable, competent, capable and wise, are being backed into a corner by the same evil -yes - evil people.

In their quest to push through their own selfish agendas these evil bureaucrats are willing to ignore what is important, ignore that which champions the well being of those in need and they are willing - no, eager - to ignore the protection of those that need protecting. These evil parasites are happy to sacrifice the experienced, the intelligent, the empathetic and those with spirit and courage in order to 'look good', to appear ruthless and driven, to 'win' and appeear worthy of their inflated pay packets. Those who dare to speak out, to question and challenge are targeted and shot down. Blown away. And fuck the ultimate consequences. Because those evil doers will have moved on to pastures new by the time the shit hits the fan.

Once again I have to look at what I do, how I do it and, once again, although in a job I love and think I do reasonably well, I have to re-evaluate my position.

People who do their job badly have to be challenged, educated and supported to change. They need to be encouraged to perform better. Of course there will be those who perform their roles so badly they have to be replaced but sadly, in my experience I see those who, although they may perform badly, if they are prepared to tow the corporate line will find themselves carried and allowed to continue failing those they serve. I have observed those that question, offer justifiable criticism, ask difficult questions and have high expectations from those in authority being victimised and hung out to dry and those that do the hanging pat themselves on the back and congratulte themselves on a job well done. It is not enough to be excellent at your job, it is not enough to have principles, to want to make a difference. It is only enough to be a 'yes' man. The following, from this weeks Observer, is what happens to those who say 'No'.


Sacking of school headteachers 'rises by 75%'Tougher line adopted on heads who struggle to raise exam results, claims ASCL general secretary
(1)Tweet this (20)Jessica Shepherd The Observer, Sunday 7 March 2010 Article historyRecord numbers of headteachers were sacked last year for failing to boost their schools' GCSE grades, it will be claimed today.

At least 163 heads or their deputies were fired in 2009 – 75% more than in 2007, the Association of School and College Leaders (ASCL) will reveal at its annual conference in London.

Ministers and local authorities are adopting a tougher line on heads who struggle to raise exam results, John Dunford, the association's general secretary, will say, adding that other heads have been told to quit even if exam results have improved, because their schools have turned into academies and sponsors want new leaders.

The revelation on Friday that the number of schools judged to be "inadequate" has almost doubled in the last six months to one in 13 will further fuel the rise in sackings, Dunford told the Observer. Schools placed in this category are put in emergency "special measures" and risk being reopened as academies under new leadership.

Dunford said: "We have lost a lot of talented schools' leaders who are unlikely to return to another headship after such a bruising experience. When a school is put in special measures, the local authority is under pressure from the government to be seen to be taking action and this could lead to a head being sacked. Some local authorities think sacking a few headteachers is evidence that they are vigilant and active in school improvement."

Meanwhile, Nick Clegg, the Liberal Democrat leader, promised heads the freedom to "transform" the national curriculum if his party came to power.

Speaking at the ASCL conference, Clegg said: "We will allow teachers to innovate for the good of their pupils. We will cut the reins and expect you to reinvent and transform the curriculum. The majority of what you teach will be at your discretion."

I was wondering on the drive home tonight if it was worth spoiling my ballot paper in the next election. Not being given the choice of 'none of the above' I was seriously considering writng on the ballot 'none of you thieving bastards deserve my vote' but maybe Cleggs promise to 'allow teachers to innovate for their pupils' will get my vote. Providing of course the Lib Dem canditate for my area hasn't been flipping!

Tips for Tourists re Rude Londoners

Bendy Buses, Double Deckers, Taxis, Tubes and Trains

Natural habitats for the 'Jobs Worths' who take great pleasure-

in causing grief and giving unneccessary pain,

Right Change? Wrong Ticket? Slap a fine for good measure.


'Yeah..what do you want, the special?' asks the sullen waitress,

pencil poised, wearing an expression of the utmost glum.

Just where do they find these people? who couldn't care less?

Yet, no doubt she'll expect a tip, not a well earned kick up the bum!


Dare to interrupt a couple of young shop assistants chatting -

They will turn to you with disdain,

Any request that you make may as well have been said in Latin,

For they will make you feel as if you are being a pain!


'Excuse me, how do I get to Leicester Square'

Innocently asked of a passer by, will get you a look as if you had said -

'Cor, look at the knockers on her! Lovely. What a fine pair!

They will give you the stare, and you'll wish you'd stayed in bed.


You will have heard that Londoners queue, and that you'd better stand in line

British bobbies are the best - but beware travelling on the underground

For if they shout 'Stop!' you had better obey them in time,

As a young man called Jean Charles De Menezes tragically found.

Enjoy your Visit!

Rude Londoners, Take That and Insurance claims

The bus was still at the bus stop, caught up in the traffic. We ran to catch it before it moved off - me, my daughter, her partner and my young grandson. It had been a wonderful day and we had left the car on the south side of the bridge and just needed the bus for one stop as my grandsons little legs were tired from hours of walking around Trafalgar Square, Soho and Covent Garden. The bus driver refused to acknowledge our presence. We tapped on the door. The driver, without even looking at us, shook his head. He stared straight ahead, wearing wrap round dark glasses and steadfastly refused to open the door. The bus was stationary, at a bus stop and more or less empty. He drove off, no doubt pleased with himself that he had the power to refuse a family 'permission' to board his bus. We climbed aboard the next bus that stopped (several yards from the stop and presented the driver with our six coins. He said 'I'm sorry, you have to have a travel card or purchase a ticket from the machine at the stop.' We looked at the machine (now seemingly miles from the bus) and resigned ourselves to missing yet another bus, and feeling tired and deflated, made to make our way off the bus. My daughter said 'but we just want to travel one stop, over the bridge' and the driver, taking pity on us said 'don't worry, just take a seat'. So in a matter of minutes we had been treated badly by one driver and with generosity of spirit by another. I was interested to hear today that a survey had reported that Londoners were rude and unhelpful. Bus Driver # 1 certainly fitted that description. Let's hope that visitors to this great city meet more drivers like bus driver # 2!

My daughter was extremely angry at bus driver # 2. But let's face it...this guy must lead a very depressing, unfulfilled life if he gets satisfaction out of small acts of tyranny. You have to feel sorry for him. I read somewhere the other day that if you are subjected to road rage instead of reacting aggressively you should smile, and blow the driver a kiss. Now I think this is an excellent idea. If you really want to wind someone up that is. It would beat the two finger sign by miles. I think there should be a website where members of the disgruntled public can post pictures of these various twats with a brief description of their idiotic act and invite people to comment. Something called 'Wanker Central' or 'TWATS R US'. Fuck blowing kissed o giving the 'V' sign, from now on I'm whipping out my camera and saying 'say cheese'.

Yet another man admits to being a cheat and a liar...cute little Mark Owen of Take That fame. Why, if you are a babe magnet, rich, and horny, would you get married? Why not stay free to play the field and fuck who you want, when you want, without having to lie to someone you have promised to be faithful too? Although to be fair to Owen he has been faithful since he got married 5 months ago. All ten infidelities took place in the days he was just dating the mother of his children. Boys...stay free and single. MUCH easier. Duh! I saw Take That live last summer and they put on a wonderful show. Trapeze artists, jugglers, clowns, tight rope walkers, magicians and a circus parade. Even a huge mechanical elephant similar to one I saw in St James’ Park a few years ago made an appearance. The lads themselves rode on stage at one point on unicycles (except Barlow who rode a tiny two wheeler complete with stabilisers). I say lads because the four men are lads. Not ‘Jack the Lads’ type lads but nice 'lad's. Unassuming, unpretentious...nice. Not what you expect ‘pop stars’ to be. In fact it almost seemed that these four lads where grateful to be entertaining us. Happy to be in the public eye and no doubt relieved to be earning the big bucks again. Barlow's opening line was ‘Wembley? Who’d have thought?’ and certainly who would have thought that back in the 90s when Robbie left the band and they struggled on as a foursome for some months before finally throwing in the towel. From virtual obscurity too, 10 years later, fillng stadiums such as Wembley and achieving phenomenal record sales? The concert opened with ‘The greatest time of your life’ which is perfect for introducing an extravaganza of sights and sounds. It set the scene for all the visual and audio treats that were to follow over the next couple of hours. A great saxophone player had a solo spot during ‘A Million Love Songs Later’ and the lads surprised me by each playing an instrument. A further surprise was when the two lads whose names escape me took centre stage and sung surprisingly well.
The audience went mad whenever a little of the old Take That showed itself. Usually when the lads lined up and did a few dance moves. But these moves where kept to a minimum. Take That 2009 were clearly serious about how they were evolving. They really seemed to want to ‘share’ the whole experience with the audience. Barlow writes good pop songs, not least of which is 'Patience' which is the song that has given them another bite of the fame cherry. 10 years on from their first successes the odds were against them. They had ruled before the day of the ‘Pop Idol’ and ‘The X Factor’. They ruled the airwaves before Britain had talent. Their fans were now mums themselves with children. Since the TT days we have had Eminem, Rhainna and Lady GaGa. Boy Bands are so passé unless they are black and bad (or at least one of them is) or - almost black and 'boy next door' like JLS. So nearing middle age, with a middle age spread (Barlow) or forging ahead with unremarkable solo careers (Owen) and hell, God only knows what the other two were doing (DJing in Ibiza or selling timeshares rings a bell for the lads who's names I don't even know) TT decided to throw caution to the wind and give it another go. And thank god they did. More great songs, more entertainment and enjoyment for all concerned. They have taken risks. The circus theme for instance, must logistically be a nightmare and a huge expense but they pulled it off.




Talking of lying, why is it that if you have to make an insurance claim you are made to feel like you are lying when you're not? Today I had to make a claim and from the minute I started speaking to 'Jackie' I felt that every word I said was disbelieved. It didn't help that I had moved and neglected to tell them, or that I had to phone my daughter to ask for my bank account number but when they finally agreed that my claim would be met 'in principle' they then demanded I pay the excess immediately using a 'card that was in same name as that on the policy'. I explained that my card was in my married name and the policy was in my maiden name. Now this is were they really got on their high horse and I could feel Jackie's suspicion pumping down the phone line and spilling out on to my lap. After going off to check with her supervisor Jackie told me that they would accept payment 'this time' but I had to change the policy into my married name. 'No I don't' I said. ' I have every right to use whatever name I like.' Jackie said 'but you are married. You have to use you husbands name.' Jackie obviously was stuck in the 1940s. This is my second experience with insurers in the last couple of months. I tried claiming on my home insurance for some damage done in my home by a leak from an incorrectly fitted flue but when I received the claim form and got estimates I felt so stressed I decided not to bother. I think this is what insurance companies rely on. People giving up.

avatars, dreams and enlightenment

Most of us have a 'dream self', a version of our self that appears in our dreams and each night stars in whatever drama our brain creates for them. Sometimes the dream self's are the every day version of ourselves and sometimes they are more like an avatar, something that represents us in the dream world. Last night I had a dream about memories.

My friend asked me how my grandson was, 'fine' I answered 'and how are your grandchildren?' They smiled that indulgent smile only proud grandparents can make and said 'wonderful, the house is full of ghosts when they visit'. 'Ghosts?' I asked.

My friend went onto explain, 'when my grandchildren visit I see the ghosts of my own children. I see my children when they were young, asking questions, reading books, chattering and playing. Then my children all grownup will say something and the ghost children disappear'.

Ghost
To see your own ghost in your dream, symbolizes aspects of yourself that you fear. This may involve a painful memory, guilt, or some repressed thoughts. Or you may be afraid of death and dying. Alternatively, ghosts are representative of something that is no longer obtainable or within reach. It indicates that you are feeling disconnected from life and society. Try to figure out what the ghosts wants or what it is looking for. Alternatively, the dream may be a calling for you to move on and abandon your outdated modes of thinking and behavior.


What my friend was talking about was memories.

My dream self understood this completely and even awake I can appreciate what my friend meant. But sometimes a dream can reveal what seems like a truth about the world, can show answers with perfect clarity, can bestow an enlightenment that unfortunately fades as soon as you wake. A couple of weeks ago I had a dream that revealed the cause of deja vue and in my dream I understood the concept completely, how and why it happens and that knowledge cast light in the shadows of the unknown. On waking the basic explanation was still in my mind, an explanation wrapped up in dreams, memory and lapses of time - but by the time I had woken up completely the knowledge faded and disappeared.

Memory
To dream about a memory, suggests that your are ready to rid yourself of your old ways and undergo some sort of transformation and new outlook in life. Recalling a memory in your dream may also be less of a shock then if you had recalled the memory in your waken state. It indicates that you may have learned something from your past.

I am so glad that I dream.

The Surrendered Woman

The Surrendered Wife http://www.surrenderedwife.com/ first came to public notice back in 2001 when Laura Doyle published her book of the same title. It was a controversial subject that angered many feminists and caused lots of men to send her silent messages of thanks. Although one of the greatest critics of SW is a man, John Gottham, who is considered to be an expert on marriage. Gottham believes that balanced, caring, sharing, open and honest communication is vital for a healthy relationship. But I haven’t found these to be missing in the mantra of a Surrendered Wife.

The aim of Surrendered Wife was to transform thousands of relationships by making changes that would ultimately bring women romance and intimacy. Because no matter how content we are, no matter how independent, no matter how enlightened women are it seems we need, if not romance, then intimacy. Not physical intimacy, although that is very nice, but a spiritual intimacy.

Doyle was banking on there being ‘millions of women’ wanting to make their marriage better. One would assume there was also millions of men who wanted this too but the book wasn’t aimed at them, the assumption being that men weren’t the ones that could make the changes. It certainly implies that the power for change lies with the female. Does that mean the male is already ‘cooked’ as Judge Judy would say or does it imply that the male is powerless – without the skills to affect change. Maybe men look outwards for something that makes their relationship with their partner bearable, work, hobbies, alcohol, affairs with other women.

The English Oxford Dictionary defines ‘surrender’ as ‘to abandon oneself entirely to a powerful emotion or influence’. So are there millions of men who evoke powerful emotion in and influence over their women? Yes, of course there are. There are millions of domineering, controlling men who force their women to do their will. But these women are not in the embrace of romance or intimacy. They are victims. Doyle is very clear that her surrendered women are not submissive, and they are certainly not victims. Surrenders Wives are empowered in an alternative way, one that will bring them more fulfilment.

Doyle claims ‘Feminism may have done a lot for the workplace, but what has it done to help women find fulfilment at home? It seems to me that these people have simply empowered women to get divorced, become single mothers, get married again, and leave the next man, too, because he's no good. We're empowered to sue for lots of child maintenance, and then live struggling and lonely for the rest of our lives. Just great!'

Many of my female friends are in long term relationships and marriages. They hold down jobs, some of them have high powered jobs earning more than their husbands, others have jobs that pay the minimum wage but that wage is vital to the family. All have children. Many are dissatisfied with the relationship that they have with their man, In fact I can only think of a handful of friends who have a fulfilling relationship with their partners. All the others seem to be just ‘jogging’ along, maybe managing nicely and their discontent only comes to light after a few glasses of wine and some thinking. Maybe ‘thinking’ should be banned! None of them are having a great sex live, or if they are, it isn’t with their husbands. Some moan about their men, some mock them, some shake their heads in despair of ever understanding them and they wonder if this is how it’s going to be for the rest of their lives. Some want their men to see them as a sexual, desirable woman and far too many fall asleep with their back to their man.

But none want their marriage to end. So they just….wait.

It was reported recently that Rom Coms, the genre of film also known as ‘chick flicks’ and usually starring Jennifer Anderson, are responsible for a lot of women feeling dissatisfied with their own relationship. Where, they are prompted to ask themselves, is my heart skipping a beat moment? Why does my man not look at me with that look of intense desire in his eyes? Why doesn’t my man hang on to my every word? Because love, you nag him, piss him off and generally give him brainache! And, interestingly, gay men’s relationships are also supposedly being adversely affected by the Hollywood image of love and romance. I remember listening to a radio phone in on this subject where a gay man rang in to say how he dumped his boyfriend after seeing ‘Brockback Mountain’ as he said it left him feeling there was something missing from his relationship. Would a straight man dump his girlfriend after watching ‘Nine and a Half Weeks’? No, of course he wouldn’t, he would just suggest to her that she buys an aerosol of whipped cream and put some plastic sheets on the bed. Or he’d have an affair!

Doyle says ‘Like millions of women, I wanted my marriage to be better. But when I tried to get my husband to be more romantic, helpful and ambitious, he withdrew-- and I was lonely and exhausted from controlling everything. Desperate to be in love with my man again, I decided to stop telling him what to do and how to do it. When I surrendered control, something magical happened. The union I had always dreamed of appeared. The man who had wooed me was back.’

Now why would this happen? Do men want to have control? What’s wrong with sharing? As Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and The City might ask ‘Does the act of ‘sharing’ add something to your relationship or does it in fact take something away?’
Sharing is vital. All the financial responsibility, all the chores, all the child care should be shared. Not down the middle. But in a way that is fair and acceptable for them both and that works for the family. Balance has to be a balance that works and if a woman decides to pass all financial control to her man and it works for them that is taking responsibility. Each partner should feel their opinion, needs and desires should be acknowledged. But where there is conflict someone has to make the final decision. The SW would allow her man to do just that. And support him in that decision and work with him to ensure that the decision was the right one for them. The non SW would, if forced to go with her mans decision may sulk, complain, maybe even throw a spanner in the works so she could at some point say ‘I told you so, you should have listened to me.’ The non SW grows resentful and her opinion of her man, who, lets face it, she has helped to emasculate, diminishes and she then doesn’t want to fuck him anymore.

There was a big debate this week about whether a woman should pick up her mans socks. Some argued that by doing so she was ‘letting the side down’, that if she picked those socks up she was effectively putting the woman’s movement back a hundred years. This in a week where a woman, Lubna Hussain, is soon to go on trial in the Sudan for wearing trousers in public. If found guilty she will receive 40 lashes. So how far has the women’s movement come in the last hundred years? Not fucking far. Ok, so here in the West we don’t get physical lashes for wearing trousers but there is still a gap in pay, woman are demonised for allowing their children to be killed while the man who did the killing is not subjected to the same level of hate, mothers of feral children are attacked in the press and very few people question the fathers role. Or if they do it is the woman who is derided for not being able to keep a man. Why is it that no one seems to have asked what the father of Baby P was doing while his son (and daughters) were living in a filthy hovel with a couple of paedophiles and a woman who shouldn’t have been left in care of a goldfish? But I digress.

The bottom line is simple – The surrendered woman must leave at the front door the power she wields at work and with children in order to achieve a greater intimacy. Doyle claims it isn't 'about dumbing down or being rigid. It's certainly not about subservience. It's about following some 'basic principles' that will restore intimacy to your marriage, and with it, peace and joy and inner growth. The main principle is to relinquish 'inappropriate control' of your husband.

The following rules need to be followed in order to become a SW:
• Give up unnecessary control and responsibility
• Express their needs while also respecting their husband's choices
• Resist the temptation to criticize, belittle or dismiss their husbands
• Trust their husbands in every aspect of marriage - from sexual to financial...and more.

Dare I ask….What’s the problem with these? Isn’t it just a long winded way of saying ‘to honour and obey’. The first rule – Give up unnecessary control and responsibility includes the word ‘unnecessary’. It certainly isn’t advising women to blindly follow their man unquestionably. If, for instance your man wanted to join the Moonies, well I think it would be advisable in that instance to say ‘Er…. no. I don’t think that’s for me thank you very much’ and make an appointment with the bank to remove your share of money from any joint bank account before he signs it over to the cult leader.

Express your needs while also respecting their husband’s choices.
Think about it. The bedroom needs to be painted. He says blue, you say yellow. Yellow because blue makes you hallucinate and have violent migraines. Now, if after you have expressed this he still insists on blue the time has come for you to ask yourself ‘Do I want intimacy with this man who has so little regard for my welfare?’ A man who would act in such a way isn’t worthy of a SW. But if you have no real need for insisting on yellow then why is a woman who agrees to blue such a threat to women who hate the idea of women pleasing their man.

Resist the temptation to criticise, belittle or dismiss their husbands.
Why do some woman do this? They married him for fucks sake! Bad parents criticise, belittle and dismiss their children and bad wives/husbands do this to their spouses. My sister does this to her husband all the time. In front of their children. She pulls no punches; no topic is taboo and no swear word unused. Not everyone is this extreme however. Some women (and men) say little comments to their partners in a jokey manner that can cut the recipient of these remarks to the core. Why live like this?

Trust their husbands in every aspect of their marriage from sexual to financial
Ah…here it is. The nitty gritty. This is the rule that non surrendered women find difficult to accept. Sex and Money. Whoever has control of these is all powerful. And power corrupts. Doesn’t it?

Maureen Freely wrote an article for the Observer in 2001 ‘So a fish does need a bicycle’(I just don’t get it? Am I thick?) in which she writes ‘You must hand the family finances over to him, even if he is bad with money. And you've got to let him have his way with you, even if you don't want it , at least once a week.’ Let him have his way with you? A man you love, a man you crave a closer intimacy with? You have to ‘let him have his way with you?’ How fucking sad.

The Catholic Church is now suggesting couples say a prayer before lovemaking; ‘place within us love that truly gives, tenderness that truly unites, self-offering that tells the truth… loving physical union that welcomes’. Now this is controversial. Not the fact that the Catholic Church is suggesting couples say grace before they copulate, but the fact they are suggesting love making should be ‘welcomed’. It is recognition surely that making love with someone you love, admire, respect and have a deep friendship with is something that should be given gravitas, something that should be a delightful experience that is to be welcomed with open arms. Surrendering your mind, body and spirit to your man will take you both to a plane of ‘togetherness’ that makes you stronger as a couple.

In fact the whole tone of Freelys article about the concept of a SW is disdainful and critical. Her opening paragraph about a woman's discontentment with her man (mainly due to his annoying little habits) is aghast that a woman should take responsibility for how she feels. Freely implies that it’s the mans fault his woman is annoyed with him. It is his fault for making her unhappy. Freely asks -
Do you ever feel superior to your husband? Do you think everything would be fine if only he did what you said? Do you criticise him when he misloads the dishwasher? Do you imitate the way he clears his throat to make your friends laugh? Do you have a hard time remembering why you married him? Do you ever look at him when he's fast asleep and snoring, and wish he were someone else? If you answered yes to any of these questions, Laura Doyle, America's new self-help queen, has some very bad news for you. It's not your husband's fault that he falls so short of your expectations. The person you should be blaming is yourself.

Who else Ms Freely? If a woman feels like this about her man she should just get the fuck out. If she has to let her man have ‘his way with her at least once a week’ she should just get on her broom and fuck off. Because he is going to be happier without a woman laughing behind his back, giving him brainache and staring at the fucking ceiling while he empties his balls.

The fact that a SW is required to be ‘available for sex’ whenever her husband requires it is something that sticks in the throat of NSW. However Freely says,
The most intriguing thing is how raunchy the surrendered wives are. Oh how my mother and her friends would blush to hear the advice they give poor Kim, who has surrendered but still isn't getting as much sex as she craves. The 'keys to a happy marriage' are as follows, says Karen. 'Don't criticise him, let him make the wrong turn, give him lots of oral sex and be sure to swallow.'

You know, here's a crazy thought – perhaps the women who want to be surrendered actually desire their men?

Doyle advises ‘Never surrender to a man who is physically abusive to you, or your children, or has an 'active' addiction, or who is chronically unfaithful. It's not worth it. You can never achieve intimacy with types like that.’ Nor would you want too. And here I think is were it is…SW aren’t waving white flags. They are staking a claim. They are saying I love this man. I trust him. I want to hold his hand and let him take me on a journey through life. Doyle says she didn’t become surrendered over night. It wasn’t easy. But it was worth it.

As someone who tried it, for I’m reliably told, 7 whole minutes, I can confirm it isn’t easy. But I wish I’d tried harder!

'A truth that's told with bad intent beats all the lies you can invent.' William Blake

Writers:
James Frey: Frey wrote a biography, 'A Million Little Pieces', chronicling his harrowing journey into alcohol and drugs, and the book became a best seller largely due to Oprah Winfrey selecting it for her book club which is an even better boost for sales that Richard and Judy choosing a book for their club. Endorsements like this are priceless in terms of sales and Oprah always enjoys a 'harrowing journey, and/or abused child' tale. However it was later discovered that large parts of the book was fiction. After this discovery Frey appeared on the Oprah Winfrey Show for the second time and claimed that the 'demons' that had driven him to abuse alcohol and drugs were the same ones that had led him to invent events in his autobiography. Now this is a great example of working with what you have got and typical behaviour for an accomplished liar. Or storyteller. Another writer, a journalist, Janet Cooke, won a Pulitzer Prize for a piece of work called 'Jimmy's World' about an 8 year old heroin addict. It was later discovered that Cooke had made the whole story up. Cooke resigned and returned the Pulitzer. Cooke had also lied about her education claiming to have a degree from Vassar College and to have studied at the Sorbonne in Paris. But hey, the story must have been a good one as it is now being made into a film. You would have thought that the readership of 'Jimmy's World' would have be relieved to discover the story of an 8 year old heroin addict was a work of fiction. '

'A lie with a purpose is one of the worst kind, and the most profitable.' Josh Billings


Politicians:

Richard Nixon: Nixon lied about his involvement in illegal activities. A burglary at an office complex called Watergate led to the discovery of these illegal activities and has resulted in political cover ups having 'gate' tagged on to them. In fact even non political cover ups have been 'gated'. For instance, Camillagate, which involved the release of an intimate telephone conversation between Camilla and Prince Charles (while both still married to other people) was secretly recorded and the transcripts published in the tabloids.

'There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, "Yes," you know he is a crook.' ~Groucho Marx

Bill Clinton: More secret tapes, threats of impeachment and in this case DNA evidence. In many respects the scandal surrounding Clinton echoes the Watergate scandal, which brought down Nixon twenty years earlier. Clinton went as far as to lie under oath about his relationship with Monica Lewinsky. He was adamant that he 'did not have sex with this woman' and sparked much debate about what exactly constituted 'having sex'. Clinton eventually admitted 'misleading' the American people. And Mrs Clinton.

'A half-truth is a whole lie'. Yiddish Proverb

Weapons of Mass Destruction:

President Bush: Bush made 935 false statements (lies) about the security risk posed by Iraq in the two years following September 11, 2001, according to a study released by two journalism groups. 'In short, the Bush administration led the nation to war on the basis of erroneous information that it methodically propagated and that culminated in military action against Iraq on March 19, 2003,' reads an overview of the examination, conducted by the Center for Public Integrity and its affiliated group, the Fund for Independence in Journalism.'

'Make the lie big, make it simple, keep saying it, and eventually they will believe it' Adolf Hitler

Tony Blair: Blair has a website dedicated to his lies www.blairfacedlies.com

Blair says 'I have never told a lie. No. I don't intend to go telling lies to people. I did not lie over Iraq'.

The Government's case for going to war in Iraq has been torn apart by the publication of previously suppressed evidence that Tony Blair lied over Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction. A devastating attack on Mr Blair's justification for military action by Carne Ross, Britain's key negotiator at the UN, has been kept under wraps until now because he was threatened with being charged with breaching the Official Secrets Act. In the testimony revealed today Mr Ross, 40, who helped negotiate several UN security resolutions on Iraq, makes it clear that Mr Blair must have known Saddam Hussein possessed no weapons of mass destruction. He said that during his posting to the UN, 'at no time did HMG [Her Majesty's Government] assess that Iraq's WMD (or any other capability) posed a threat to the UK or its interests.'

'I would never lie. I willfully participate in a campaign of misinformation.' Fox Mulder


Truth or Lie?

Climate Change:

Rise of sea levels is 'the greatest lie ever told'

But if there is one scientist who knows more about sea levels than anyone else in the world it is the Swedish geologist and physicist Nils-Axel Mörner, formerly chairman of the INQUA International Commission on Sea Level Change. And the uncompromising verdict of Dr Mörner, who for 35 years has been using every known scientific method to study sea levels all over the globe, is that all this talk about the sea rising is nothing but a colossal scare story.

Homeopathy:

HOMEOPATHIC medicine should no longer be funded by the NHS, because there is no evidence the treatment is effective, MPs said yesterday. The Commons Science and Technology Committee said there is a lack of proof that the drugs are any more effective than a placebo.

'Truth fears no questions.' Unknown


Wo/Man Lies:
According to a study of 2000 Britons men tell twice as many lies as women. They tell,on average, six lies a day to their partner, boss and work colleagues.

'Nothings wrong, I'm fine.' is the number one lie of both sexes.

Top ten lies men tell:

1. Nothings wrong, I'm fine
2. This will be my last pint
3. No, your bum doesn't look big in that
4. I had no signal
5. My battery died
6. Sorry, I missed your call
7. I didn't have that much to drink
8. I'm on my way
9. It wasn't that expensive
10. I'm stuck in traffic

Women on the other hand tell a mere average of three lies a day and these include:

1. Nothings wrong, I'm fine
2. Oh, this isn't new, I've had it ages
3. It wasn't that expensive
4. It was in the sale
5. I'm on my way
6. I don't know where it is, I haven't touched it
7. I didn't have that much to drink
8. I've got a headache
9. No, I didn't throw it away
10. Sorry, I missed your call

'The worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid. We fear we will not find love, and when we find it we fear we'll lose it. We fear that if we do not have love we will be unhappy.' Richard Bach

Blogging, Mojo, Finding your voice and Forgiveness

Blogging is quite addictive. Trying to find your voice, playing around with words, expressing the thoughts that pop into your head is intoxicating. I think I've found my Mojo.

This afternoon I had to make a phone call to someone I haven't spoken to for 10 years. 10 years, an eternity and a blink of the eye. It is both these things, and more. In the last ten years my life has changed beyond all recognition. Where I live, how I live, who I live with with, what I do, what I read and where I go...all totally different from how it was in the Millennium year.

In that 10 years I married, got a degree, moved three times, fell out of love, fell into love...twice, changed my career, my way of thinking and much of my behaviour. In 2000 I closed my eyes for a moment and opened them a decade later to find I had a new voice and a new way of making it heard. And, today I listened to a voice that had aged a lifetime in a mere 10 years and that I only recognised in the pauses between the words.

I don't for one minute imagine that anyone is interested in my voice (blog) and I think I might just be writing for me at the moment. But my hope is that someone may stumble across it and pause for thought, maybe smile and move on. But ultimately I hope that my children and grandchildren one day open it up and get to know me on a different level. Although I shared one recent blog with my daughter the other day and she didn't seem very impressed. Just looked at me a bit indulgently and seemed slightly puzzled. I think she was thinking a blog would be more 'diary' like and not the series of rambling that it is. Maybe some 'diary' like entries will creep in (this is, I suppose, a diary like entry) but I am hoping that the reason she doesn't 'get' my blog is because I am still around and as she is young it seems all meaningless and irrelevant and that once I am dead and gone and she is in her 50s, 60, and 70s she will enjoy hearing my voice again. They seem to be the ages that children finally want to hear what their parents have to say.

'It's been ten years' he said in a slightly accusatory tone. When I suggested the next time he is in town we could meet up he said 'I may not be here for that long' and in the silence that followed it all made sense. Why he wanted to speak to me so badly, why he was getting all, as my mum says 'emotional'. He wants to say goodbye before it's too late. To late for what? To ask for my forgiveness or to hear me ask for his?

Mindfulness of Breathing Meditation....Put attention on the breath:


Have forgiveness in your heart for anything you think you've done wrong . Forgive yourself for all the past omissions and commissions. They are long gone. Understand that you were a different person and this one is forgiving that one that you were. Feel that forgiveness filling you and enveloping you with a sense of warmth and ease.

Think of your parents. Forgive them for anything you have ever blamed them for. Understand that they too are different now. Let this forgiveness fill them, surround them, knowing in your heart that this is your most wonderful way of togetherness.

Think of your nearest and dearest people . Forgive them for anything that you think they have done wrong or are doing wrong at this time. Fill them with your forgiveness. Let them feel that you accept them. Let that forgiveness fill them. Realizing that this is your expression of love.

Now think of your friends. Forgive them for anything you have disliked about them. Let your forgiveness reach out to them, so that they can be filled with it, embraced by it.

Think of the people you know, whoever they might be, and forgive them all for whatever it is that you have blamed them for, that you have judged them for, that you have disliked. Let your forgiveness fill their hearts, surround them, envelope them, be your expression of love for them.

Now think of any special person whom you really need to forgive. Towards whom you still have resentment, rejection, dislike. Forgive him or her fully. Remember that everyone has dukkha. Let this forgiveness come from your heart. Reach out to that person, complete and total.

Think of any one person, or any situation, or any group of people whom you are condemning, blaming, disliking. Forgive them, completely. Let your forgiveness be your expression of unconditional love. They may not do the right things. Human beings have dukkha. And your heart needs the forgiveness in order to have purity of love.

Have a look again and see whether there's anyone or anything, any where in the world, towards whom you have blame or condemnation. And forgive the people or the person, so that there is no separation your heart.

Now put your attention back on yourself. And recognize the goodness in you. The effort you are making. Feel the warmth and ease that comes from forgiveness."

May all beings have forgiveness in their hearts!

Guided meditation Ven Ayya Khema

taking things too literally....not me!

Singer-songwriter Carly Simon has launched a competition giving fans the chance to make the first ever video for her much debated song, 'You're So Vain'. The record was released in the early 1970's before songs had to have the obligatory video to accompany it. Or as Simon says 'People were so busy asking me who the song was about that nobody thought to make a video of it'. Didn't people multi task in the 70s?

The song is about a confident man who has girls swooning over him wherever he goes and there has been debate for almost 40 years about his identity. Suggestions have included Mick Jagger, Warren Beatty and Carly's ex husband James Brown. But Simon has remained tight lipped about who this lady magnet really is.

Ms Simon is to judge the competition entries herself and has given some suggestions as to what the winning entry might include such as a yacht, a Learjet and a horse race, all of which are mentioned in the song. Quite how she expects the average
fan to have access to these things is a bit of a mystery. But maybe her fans would go to any lengths have a chance of winning the prize which, as well as having their winning video shown at New York's Tribeca Film Festival later this year, they also will receive a prize from Simon's "personal archives."


You walked into the party like you were walking onto a yacht
Your hat strategically dipped below one eye
Your scarf it was apricot
You had one eye in the mirror as you watched yourself go by
And all the girls dreamed that they'd be your partner
They'd be your partner, and...

You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you
You're so vain, I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't You?

You had me several years ago when I was still quite naive
Well you said that we made such a pretty pair
And that you would never leave
But you gave away the things you loved and one of them was me
I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee
Clouds in my coffee, and...

You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you
You're so vain, I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't You? Don't You?

I had some dreams they were clouds in my coffee
Clouds in my coffee, and...

You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you
You're so vain, I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't You?

Well I hear you went up to Saratoga and your horse naturally won
Then you flew your lear jet up to Nova Scotia
To see the total eclipse of the sun
Well you're where you should be all the time
And when you're not you're with
Some underworld spy or the wife of a close friend
Wife of a close friend, and...

You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you
You're so vain, I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't You? Don't you?

You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you
You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you

It made me think about songs that would benefit from having a video. I have always thought it is a tragedy that great songs from the 70s failed to have a video made because people in those days were far to busy asking for the meaning behind the lyrics. Here is a couple of songs that I would love see remastered, redigtalised, revived and recorded on DVD. Literally.

Laughing Gnome - David Bowie

I was walking down the High Street
When I heard footsteps behind me
And there was a little old man (Hello)
In scarlet and grey, shuffling away (laughter)
Well he trotted back to my house
And he sat beside the telly (Oaah..)
With his tiny hands on his tummy
Chuckling away, laughing all day (laughter)

Oh, I ought to report you to the Gnome office
(Gnome Office)
Yes
(Hahahahaha)

Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you can't catch me"
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you can't catch me"
Said the laughing Gnome

Well I gave him roasted toadstools and a glass of dandelion wine (Burp, pardon)
Then I put him on a train to Eastbourne
Carried his bag and gave him a fag
(Haven't you got a light boy?)
"Here, where do you come from?"
(Gnome-man's land, hahihihi)
"Oh, really?"

In the morning when I woke up
He was sitting on the edge of my bed
With his brother whose name was Fred
He'd bought him along to sing me a song

Right, let's hear it
Here, what's that clicking noise?
(That's Fred, he's a "metrognome", haha)

(Own up, I'm a gnome, ain't I right, haha)
"Haven't you got an 'ome to go to?"
(No, we're gnomads)
"Didn't they teach you to get your hair cut at school?
you look like a rolling gnome."
(No, not at the London School of Ecognomics)

Now they're staying up the chimney
And we're living on caviar and honey (hooray!)
Cause they're earning me lots of money
Writing comedy prose for radio shows
It's the-er (what?)
It's the Gnome service of course

Of course finding the gnomes may be bit tricky, and using a midget instead may be considered a bit un PC but it may be possible for the sake of 'art'. And the gnome has to be a happy gnome...it says so in the lyrics. And not only happy but talented! Not sure you could show anyone enjoying a fag on in a video these days.

Sympathy for the Devil - Rolling Stones


Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and faith

And I was 'round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game

I stuck around St. Petersburg
When I saw it was a time for a change
Killed the Czar and his ministers
Anastasia screamed in vain

I rode a tank
Held a general's rank
When the Blitzkrieg raged
And the bodies stank

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah
Ah, what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, oh yeah
(woo woo, woo woo)

I watched with glee
While your kings and queens
Fought for ten decades
For the gods they made
(woo woo, woo woo)

I shouted out,
"Who killed the Kennedys?"
When after all
It was you and me
(who who, who who)

Let me please introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for troubadours
Who get killed before they reached Bombay
(woo woo, who who)

Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails
Just call me Lucifer
'Cause I'm in need of some restraint
(who who, who who)

So if you meet me
Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy, have some taste
(woo woo)
Use all your well-learned politesse
Or I'll lay your soul to waste, mmm yeah
woo, woo
What's my name

Where would you begin making a video for this that was representative of the lyrics in a literal way?

I always wondered why Pans People, who, in the days before pop videos, danced to songs whose original artists were not available to perform them live and were usually choreographed in away that literally reflected the lyrics of the song they were dancing too. So if 'Top of the Pops' were playing, for instance, the great Cher song 'Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves', they would be dressed as sexy gypsies going around pick pocketing the pockets of strategically placed male models, or if the song that week had the word 'rain' in the lyrics they carried umbrellas. Talking of umbrellas, Rihanna, the most famous Barbadian of the moment, released a hugely successful song a couple of years ago called 'Umbrella'. The accompanying video featured a scantily clad Rihanna gyrating with an umbrella. That is almost as unimaginative as Pans People, who when 'Monster Mash' was in the charts these beautiful girls were in King Kong costumes. Apparently it had to do with lack of time to prepare and of course in the 70s people couldn't multi task.

I look forward to seeing the winning entry to the 'You're So Vain' competition. And maybe finding out one day who the song is about. If it wasn't for the yachts and Lear Jets I would be inclined to think it was non famous person she had once loved and that is why she has kept it secret for so long. Sometimes the truth is disappointing.

Reasons to be cheerful.... and sad 123

Summer, Buddy Holly, the working folly
Good golly Miss Molly and boats
Hammersmith Palais, the Bolshoi Ballet
Jump back in the alley and nanny goats
Ian Drury

Spring, Ziggy Stardust, the latent lust
Watching the CanCan kicks and soaps
Hackney Empire, the local flicks
Knock down ginger,and skipping ropes
Rattie

Drove past a carpet of crocuses this morning, a blaze of purple and yellow. Enjoyed two days of blue skies and felt sun on my face. Spring is peeping out and the Winter is coming to an end. About bloody time!

Why isn't smugness a deadly sin? Seven may be the 'magic' number but if we are going to have deadly sins why not have eight eh? Add smugness to wrath, avarice, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony. 'Smugness' - Exhibiting or feeling great or offensive satisfaction with oneself or with one's situation; self-righteously complacent. Even worse when accompanied by 'gloating' - To feel or express great, often malicious, pleasure or self-satisfaction. Smugloating! See what I've done there? That thing people did with 'chill' and 'relax' -'chillaxing'. Hmmm.

I was became aware of someone smugloating today. And then I happened to notice it in several other situations and it is not nice. If someone has tried hard to make something work, taken a few risks, gone out on a limb, if their venture hasn't worked out the last thing they need is someone saying,(while wearing the face of a cat who's got the cream), 'yeah, I knew you were wasting your time, some people just can't be helped, don't know why you bothered' or when someones job is one the line the last thing they want to hear is 'yeah, glad I saw the writing on the wall and got out before the shit hit the fan'. Maybe it is just more prevalent in times of uncertainty. There are some not very nice people out there.

Today a very nice man died, Michael Foot, ex leader of the Labour Party (when it was the Labour Party)and book lover. I was fortunate to see Mr Foot at the Hackney Empire some years ago. I remember him as being very old and frail, but enthralling. He read something from a much loved book of his (I can't remember what it was) but it had meant a lot to him and his nephew, Paul, who had recently died and for whom the evening at the Empire was a tribute for. I remember he finished with a joke about the book and the audience were moved from sadness to laughter in a matter of minutes. I remember too the respect and admiration the audience had for this great man of politics. RIP.